BY MICHAEL GOODPASTER
(FOUR) GARY OLDMAN
Gary Oldman is such a hipster that he’s already two annoying trends ahead of the world. It’s weird because he’s an older man, but he still shows up looking more hipster than a Chicago kid in skinny jeans. The bold brimmed glasses, tattered old ironic-style shirts, and more accessories than Johnny Depp on a talk show. Still, we have to respect Oldman. He’s in the Chris Nolan Batman franchise. That is enough to deem him a lifetime of respect, but he has done so much cool stuff. He has Dracula, True Romance, Hannibal, The Fifth Element, The Book of Eli, and he even killed JFK in JFK! That’s just a few. He can dress and act however he wants.
(THREE) ELLEN PAGE
Canadian hipsters DO exist. This up and coming actress has landed some really big and impactful roles in a short time. She was in the hipst-ier-iest hipster movie of all time with Juno. In it she starred and showed the entire world what a teenage hispster girl would do and act like if she got knocked up by an awkward hipster boy. They’d pull out the accustic guitar and duet like their lives and souls depended on it. Not before a quirky conversation about old pop culture. Then she pops up in more stuff. She does her comic book stuff with X-Men and then gets to be part of movie magic with Inception. “She’s so indie, but I mean… that’s totally her. She’s not living to be part of a certain label of people. She’s so real! Yay, skinny and/or thrift store jeans!”
(TWO) ELIJAH WOOD
I think Elijah Wood was born a hipster. He had like the perfect career for a hipster. He was in a few culty-unknown movies as a kid like “North” and “The Good Son”. Then he shows up in the more nerdy independent style movies. Meanwhile he’s in Lord of the Rings, one of the nerdiest things ever. He’d probably more of a nerd than a hipster, but he walks that fine line. I’m sure he’s a cool guy, but if he denied being a hipster then he’s either lying or he has really outgrown his grunge clothes.
(ONE) JASON SCHWARTZMAN
Schwartzman is the king of the hipsters. Dude was in Rushmore for crying out loud! He is the nephew of Francis Ford Coppola, but it doesn’t seem like that’s an avenue that’s ever been crossed yet. He was in an indie band called Phantom Planet and was the drummer. They had the big song “California” but still carry on without him and do pretty well for themselves. Schwartzman has an awesome HBO show called “Bored to Death” that I’d recommend to anyone who enjoys laughing. He’s a hipster, sure, but I really have nothing bad to say about Max Weber.
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