[BLOG]DAILY FOURNICATION
4 Random Questions V.3
05/25/12
BY MICHAEL GOODPASTER

(FOUR) WHY ARE PEOPLE SO AFRAID OF SOMEONE “RAINING ON THEIR PARADE” WHEN THEY HAVE “FLOATS” RIGHT THERE?
I’m already against the idea of parades. I don’t like parades of ANY type, so don’t think I’m just being hateful towards one group. Why do people need to gather, walk down streets, and screw up traffic? How does this show unity? How does this prove anything? What does this accomplish? I’m all for gatherings, unity, and celebration… just not in an invasive mobile “look at me!” party. There is that term people use when someone is down on something, like I am with parades. They’ll say “don’t rain on my parade, man!”… Why does it bother you so much? Everyone knows any parade that matters has “floats”. The creators that be have been preparing for people to rain on parades since the start.


(THREE) IF OLD SCHOOL TV COUPLES DIDN’T SLEEP IN THE SAME BED THEN HOW THE HELL DID THEY HAVE ALL OF THOSE KIDS?
In all of those old TV shows, the couples sleep in two separate beds. Beaver and Wally’s bedroom in “Leave it to Beaver” is pretty much how the bedrooms looked for the adults on TV at the time. The only thing that’s different is the lack of generic sports pennant. If there was this much of a gag between the beds where did the kids come from? Is this a case of the chicken arriving before the egg? Did they kidnap babies? I demand blood tests…


(TWO) WHAT IS SO “RARE” ABOUT UNCOOKED MEAT?
The classifications of meat are weird. Why not go with “not cooked, sorta cooked, cooked, cooked longer, and burn it”? Isn’t all uncooked meat considered “rare”? This would mean that ALL meat is “rare” at one point. By definition the word “rare” means something that’s scarce. It would be like calling bread “untoasted toast”. I wonder if cannibals see people walking around and think “Yum! Rare meat!” I won’t even put my brain into the idea of figuring out why meat that’s cooked longer is considered “well done”.


(ONE) WHY DOES THE WORD “LACKADASICAL” TAKE SO MUCH EFFORT TO SPELL & TYPE?
I can spell and I can type fairly fast, but the word “lackadaisical” is a tedious word to type, say, and spell. The definition of the word is basically laid back and lazy. There is nothing laid back about all of those syllables. The use of the word almost counteracts the idea of being “lazy”. In fact, I need a nap after this.




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