[MUSIC] THE SAVAGE ANIMAL "10 Songs About Winning"
03.16.11
BY MIKEY MIGO
I’m going to start this off by apologizing. I didn’t want to do this. I didn’t want to get sucked into the Charlie Sheen thing. I don’t currently reside under a rock so I’m well aware of what’s going on. I know way more than I wanted to about this current spree of insanity. I’m a somewhat avid watcher of The Dan Patrick Show and that’s pretty much were all of this started. Before he called in to Paulie’s phone and then to the main line, this was all contained pretty much to TMZ and gossip trades. Once he got on there it was all over. He started showing up EVERY WHERE. He had “candid interviews” with anyone who’d book him. He charmed the hearts of everyone he crossed and everyone he encounters ends up not having anything but positive things to say about him.
I think we all want to believe him. We want him clean and sober, but we still want him crazy. It’s a bit disgusting if you think about it. Obviously this guy is having a breakdown, meltdown, and downfall in front of the world. He needs help and to calm down. His rationale can’t be THIS crazy to be real. There is a very good chance that something tragic is going to come of this. At that point everyone will proclaim their heartfelt nonsense and sentimental bullshit. Meanwhile, right now… while it’s a popular joke… you’ll ride it out. The hypocritical hype that’s going to come from this is going to cripple me.
But maybe… just maybe, he knows EXACTLY what he’s doing. Maybe it’s all some Joaquin Phoenix-style scam. What if Simon Rex is really recording a documentary about all of this. I want this to be the truth. I want Charlie Sheen to be responsible for one of the greatest “works”(wrestling term #59026) of all time. If he didn’t get an Oscar for it then I’d be shocked. It would be monumental and would change the entertainment business forever. This is probably just the wrestling fan in me, but I’d love for this kind of swerve to come.
I will take some positivity from this though. The words of Charlie Sheen are sticking with people. They might be ironic and snarky, but in reality what’s so wrong with “winning”? He might drink tiger blood, he might have ruined John Cryer’s life, and he may have rocked it in “Men At Work”… but “winning” is cool with me. With that, I’m going to throw a list together in tribute to Charlie Sheen and winning. He has a few “tour dates” coming up. Maybe he could use this as his preshow mix, who knows….
“ If You Leave” by Orchestral Manoeuvers in the Dark
This has nothing to do with “winning”. I know. I include this because of the late great Jon Cryer. He’s still alive, but now with Sheen jumping ship the show is going to be really iffy. It could manage to stay on for another ten years but a recasting THIS big might screw up the show for good. I can only imagine Jon Cryer sitting on a pile of sitcom money(it’s shiner than real money) with a single tear coming from his eye as he put on his circle sunglasses… then,… and only then… he cues THIS song.
Any way...
“Win” by David Bowie
I could have easily gone with “Fame” in this case. I love “Fame”, but there are like a million and four other David Bowie songs that deserve your attention. In this case, this mid 70’s somber track in the way to go. It’s just a really good laid back track. Bowie displays some awesome vocals to a simplistic tune while the backup singers only compliment what I’d have to consider a really underrated gem. Throughout this song we hear Bowie almost sneak in the words “it ain’t over”. I would hope so in Charlie Sheen’s case. At the same time the line “Me, I’m fresh on your pages/Secret thinking sometimes listening aloud” kinda works perfectly too.
“The Best” by Bonnie Tyler
Screw Tina Turner. It’s not HER song. This Bonnie Tyler lady did it first. Yeah, I don’t know who Bonnie Tyler is either. And yeah, so what if Tina Turner’s version is like a thousand times better. I feel for Bonnie. This could have been her big shot, but no. Oh well, neither of them wrote it to begin with. Charlie Sheen is a winner. When you win enough you pretty much automatically become the best. Makes sense to me.
“Wild Thing” by X
Chip Taylor, brother of Jon Voight, wrote this song. It was originally recorded in 1965 and then again in 1966 by The Troggs. Their version reached number one and is considered one of the greatest songs of all time. In 1989, the movie Major League used this song but a cover version by a LA punk band called “X”. The song was the entrance theme for Rick “Wild Thing” Vaughn and has to be the song most associated with Charlie Sheen out there. I like it because of the built in crowd singing a long and the chick’s vocals are sorta sexy. I also didn’t know Sheen was actually a pitcher in school. When the movie was shot, this actor was hitting speeds of 85mph. Impressive! WIN!
“Winning” by Santana
It’s not that I don’t like the band Santana. Carlos Santana obviously a very talented guitar player and seems like a really cool dude, but I’ve just never found myself a fan of his music. I’d be lying if I could even pretend to know anything about the original “Santana” band. The song is cheesy and hell, but the message is clear... “I’m win-ning!”
“We Are The Champions” by Queen
Winning a lot does just make you Charlie Sheen or the best; it also often leads to being a champion of some sort. They may be a few, but I don’t many songs are as EPIC as this one. Freddie Mercury was a bit off kilter too, but should and will go down in rock history as one of the greatest vocalists of all time. I’m not making THAT comparison, but surely there’s no time for losing on Planet Sheen.
“You’re The Best” by Joe Esposito
A list about winning that does not include Rush isn’t that victorious in my book. It’s a newer Rush song, but it’s still pretty bad ass. It just seems that Sheen has tons of wins throughout the day. Like he pours his bowl of cereal every morning only for the toy to be in EVERY bowl his pours. That kind of “win” is nothing to Charlie. Just part of a normal day. Just “one little victory” of many…
“Playing to Win” by Little River Band
In 1984, Charlie Sheen was 19 years old. I’d be almost sure that he probably had an 80’s mullet and loves this song. It’s honestly the first time I’ve EVER heard it. But I can’t help but enjoy the video. It’s 80’s cheese at its best. The key-tar, yellow rimmed glasses, and extreme glow make this video classic. I know a lot of people think Charlie Sheen might be milking his situation and doing all of this for publicity. I don’t know about that. I don’t think he’s playing but if he is, I’m positive he’s playing to win.
“Greatest Man That Ever Lived” by Weezer
Holy shit, this song is awesome. I’m a bit surprised I’ve not heard this before. I’m a Weezer fan, but I don’t get my hands on all their albums. The video is simple, but it’s fun and different. It manages to sneak in eleven different themes including rap, Nirvana, Slipknot, Aerosmith, and others. Just like Charlie Sheen, this song encompasses a lot of win yet does their own thing. Epic win!
“Winning – a Song by Charlie Sheen” by Songify This
This video is actually made specifically for this topic. These guys did that “Hide Yo’ Kids, Hide Yo’ Wife” video and have been riding the success train through any and every pop culture story they can. They took some of the best parts of Sheen’s interviews and remixed them together, threw on some autotune, and added their own verse to it. The dude’s verse wasn’t horrible, but it felt tacked on to an already cool video. The second he starts rapping it takes away from the winning. Then the winning/weak thing at the end was kind of funny, but it felt too close to a Digital Short type of joke to give them full credit. Never less the criticisms, this video is still funny and has like a trillion views already. Epic.
What songs make YOU think about WINNING and/or Charlie Sheen?
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