BY MICHAEL GOODPASTER
Every month or so I’ll take in dose of musical medicine. No matter how much we all love music and no matter how much we do take in there is no possible way for us to hear EVERYTHING. We’re all going to miss the boat on something. Sometimes it’s because a certain genre isn’t our thing, sometimes we’re in the wrong era, and sometimes we just miss the boat. For better or for worse, we have to cop up to our ignorance every so often. One way to rectify this situation is to listen to new music. For me, I’ll find a band that has three to five studio albums and I’ll listen to their entire studio discography. Sometimes this experience sucks ass and I want to stop five minutes in, but there are always those moments where my mind is blown by “fresh noise”(patent pending!(seriously)).
Why The Police?
Why not The Police? For years I’ve heard them being brought up in iconic discussions. I know who some of the key players are and I’m sure I know some of the big singles. The problem is that I don’t know the difference between some Sting songs and some songs by The Police. On top of that I have a feeling that I’ll hear a song that I didn’t know was by these guys or a song I completely forgot existed. Regardless, I’m going into this five album listening experience with some optimism. Even if I don’t fall in love with what I hear, I’m expecting it to at least be a pleasant “first impression”.
Only one way to find out…
Outlandos d'Amour
(1978 – 38 minutes) - The Police’s debut album starts off with "Next to You". It sounds nothing like what I know as “The Police”. It’s a bouncy pop rock song. It’s not bad, but a little forgettable. "So Lonely" sounds like what I expected. A light reggae funk love ballad. It’s not bad.
The music, the emotive pull in the vocals, and the melody are all notable. Of course I know the song "Roxanne". The drinking game for this song is amazing.
Whenever you hear “Roxanne” take a drink. You WILL get tow’ up from da’ flo’ up for sure. It’s a catchy song and iconic as they come. "Hole in My Life" is sorta bad ass. It’s funky, but not too dancey. It just has a pimp-tastic tone. It’s kind of the same with "Peanuts". It’s a really cool funky song. I’m surprised by "Can't Stand Losing You" because I know I’ve heard it. It’s a good song for sure, but I just don’t think I knew it was a song by The Police.
That or I completely forgot about it. The music is catchy and awesome, but the lyrics are a little repetitive. The break down is cool as shit and the lyrics are dark as hell. I always knew there was a darker tone to The Police because of the stalker-nature of some of their biggest hits, but wow. The lyrics boldly talk about killing one self to make an ex feel bad. I did not expect that from the tantric sex guy. "Truth Hits Everybody" feels like a bit of filler. It’s not a badly executed song, but it just doesn’t connect or latch on. "Born in the 50's" is lame. I appreciate the fact that its delivery and style is different than what their normal sound was at the time, but it just doesn’t work. Yikes. It has to be the worst song on here and hopefully the worst song I’ll have to hear today. It’s THAT bad. I was duped by "Be My Girl - Sally". It starts off normal and then goes off into a creepy piano accompanied poem about screwing what sounds like a mail order whore or doll or something. It’s creepy as hell, but amusing. The album closes out with "Masoko Tanga". It’s a reggae funk rock song. It has a fun groove and I found myself getting into. It makes for a great closer. I didn’t expect too much going into the album. I knew they had big hits and were a beloved band by many. I’m really impressed with the musicianship here and I can see why this album was such a big deal.
Reggatta de Blanc
(1979 – 42 minutes) - The Police kicks off their sophomore album with the huge hit "Message in a Bottle". I’ve heard it before, but I never actually took it in with headphones and an open mind.
It does have a base in the reggae stuff, but it has a slower build that makes it a really interesting song. The structure is cool and I get why this was so huge. I missed the boat here. I didn’t expect something as “big” as "Reggatta de Blanc". There is like a wall of sound with layers and layers. It’s kind of sort of epic. "It's Alright for You" sounds almost like a punk song because of its spastic delivery, but it breaks down into a decent basic rock tune. Nothing wrong with that. "Bring on the Night" doesn’t grab you like one of their big singles, but it’s a nice foot tapper. It’s forgettable, but for the time being it’s pleasant enough. "Deathwish" is a strange song. The fast-paced reggae and funk reminds me of ska, but the vocals remind me of Jane’s Addiction. Weird combo, but it works. "Walking on the Moon" sounds familiar, but it could be that the songs are all starting to sound alike. It feels like filler.
Weird speaking is heard at the start of "On Any Other Day". The vocals are delivered really weirdly and I’m not sure if I like this. I’m leaning towards no, but I totally respect the efforts in mixing it up a bit. The melody on "The Bed's Too Big Without You" is addicting. It pulls you in and does all the things a good song should. I forgot to ramble about it, so that’s a good sign. The gist of it, is another brooding groove-filled tune about being alone and the bed being too big without one’s ex. Lots of good “ex music”, I see. I absolutely love "Contact". The base line is intense as hell and it’s easy to let yourself get swept up in it. It’s just off-kilter enough to be interesting to keep paying attention, but also leaves you room to explore the cool ass tempo. "Does Everyone Stare" is a paranoid little ditty. It has a weird bounce to it, but it’s not as welcoming as you’d hope. It’s a really catchy and really off-putting song. I think I like it. The band’s second album closes out with "No Time This Time". It’s a fast-tempo rock song. It almost feels like it’s being played in fast forward. It doesn’t let up until the end. Not exactly the best finish, but it’s over. I dug the first album more, but this one wasn’t bad. There was some stuff that I didn’t connect to and that felt a bit repetitive or like filler, but I still found some stuff to appreciate. You can hear the band evolving and trying new things. That’s all you can really ask for. Progress. Moving forward I hope there’s more of that…
Zenyatta Mondatta
(1980 – 38 minutes) - The third album starts off with another big hit that I didn’t realize was by The Police, "Don't Stand So Close to Me". I suppose it makes sense, but I just never put two and two together. It’s a really cool song. Again, it’s a song that I’ve heard but didn’t absorb until now.
"Driven to Tears" has a really slick bass line and should have been a big single. I enjoy it as much as any of their major hits. It’s just got a strange breakdown that might be too trippy for some. Not me. It rocked. The title of the next song is too long. "When the World Is Running Down, You Make the Best of What's Still Around" has a shitty name, but it’s a perfectly okay disposable dance song. I’m bothered by "Canary in a Coalmine". It’s just too silly and bouncy without being much fun. Not a good combo. "Voices Inside My Head" is a decent rock song, perfectly forgettable, but decent. "Bombs Away" rides the same line that “Canary in a Coalmine” did in terms of cheesiness, but not quite as bad but very close. I’ve heard "De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da" before. It’s okay I guess. It’s a solid pop rock song, but it doesn’t catch you as much as their other iconic singles.
"Behind My Camel" is amazing. I don’t want to over-use the word “amazing” anymore, but I feel this track merits its use. It’s a mere instrumental track, but it’s hands down one of the coolest instrumentals I’ve ever heard. It’s cool, it’s spooky, it’s sleek, and I’m not even close to over-hyping it. Best song by this band so far for sure! "Man in a Suitcase" is a fun bouncy reggae rock song. "Shadows in the Rain" starts off with a bass-line that you’d expect to see a pimp strut down the street to or the beginning of some kind of vintage porn. That vibe doesn’t change, in fact you’re taken on a “groove odyssey” that last over five minutes. It sounds a little dirty based on the description I’ve given it, but it’s worth the shower. The album closes out with "The Other Way of Stopping". It’s another instrumental. It’s not as mind blowing as “Behind My Camel”, but it’s a solid finish to the album. I’m not going to lie. I was not into this album at all at start. It just didn’t seem to do anything to jar any interest out of me. Then I recognized "De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da" and the second half really picked up. On to the next…
Ghost in the Machine
(1981 – 41 minutes) - The Police’s fourth studio release starts off with “Spirits in the Material World". It’s pretty much what a lot of their songs sound like. It’s not bad, but it doesn’t do anything out of the norm to make it stand out.
I’m surprised by "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic". Of course I’ve heard this song. I had no clue it was a song by The Police. It’s a very good up-tempo pop rock song. I’m pretty sure even if you don’t realize it that if you’ve watched any movie from the late 80’s to mid-90’s then you may have heard it.
It’s the one that goes “eee ooo!” over and over again at the end. I’ve never heard "Invisible Sun", but I wish I had. The vocal delivery and droney verse and oddly paced tempo makes me think of “grunge” music. I didn’t expect that. The lyrics are dark and the tone is really ironic and drab. Cool song. "Hungry for You (J'aurais toujours faim de toi)" is a okay rock song that gets to their reggae rock roots. “Demolition Man" tries to be a long and cool epic song, but it’s not. It just kind of drags on. It’s good background music if you want to drown out what you’re listening to. Other than that, I could do without it.
"Too Much Information" starts off sounding like a bad disco song. It builds into a dance hall reggae rock song, but it’s just bad. It’s not the worst song I’ve heard today, but it’s the worst song in a while. "Rehumanize Yourself" is a bigger sign of their “new wave” trackings, but it’s nothing too out there to be a stand out. It just blends in with the rest. "One World (Not Three)" is a poppy rock track, but it’s one of their better ones. It’s another up-tempo reggae fused melody, but it works nicely. I feel like I’ve heard "Omegaman", but I’m pretty sure I’ve not. It sounds like other songs by The Police. It’s not a bad song at all. Things get all moody and new wavy with the start of "Secret Journey". It sounds like it’s going to be rad, but it turns out to be standard fare. What a tease. The LP wraps up with "Darkness". It starts off slow. It makes me think of a rainy window in slow motion. The tempo never really changes. It just sorta fades out. This wasn’t a bad album on the whole. It had the “eee ooo” song but “Invisible Sun” is the best song on this album by far though. While there were some glimpses of awesomeness; at the same time there was plenty of what felt like filler to this first time listener. I’m curious to hear how they close their run out together: more of the same or something a bit more expansive? Let’s see…
Synchronicity
(1983 – 45 minutes) - The band’s final release begins all new wavey with "Synchronicity I". It could just be me, but it feels it’s being sped up. There is a lot going on in this song. The melody is hard to really ride out. "Walking in Your Footsteps" has music that feels sped up and overly produced, but the vocals are calmer, slower, and well sung. It just doesn’t work. If anything, it’s a little grating and uncomfortable. Things become a bit less messy with "O My God". It has more a funkier base-line and is more conventional. While it’s more “connectable” to a casual listener, it’s still nothing I’d want to hear again. It reminds me a Don Henley B-side. "Mother" is another poetic verse and music type of track. This one is a crazy and frantic rant about women and mothers. It’s all sorts of screwed up, but it’s the coolest thing on this album so far. The frantic delivery of the vocals and the almost circus or carnival-like music is cool shit. If I was played this song a week ago my last guess would have been The Police. Wowzers. The album picks up a little with "Miss Gradenko". It didn’t blow my mind or anything, but it’s a solid head nod-able rock song. The opening of "Synchronicity II" makes me feel like I’ve heard it before. By the time the verse hits, I recognize it completely. This is clearly the best song on the album so far.
I know that changes with the next track though. How could anyone say ANYTHING bad about "Every Breath You Take"? It’s the possibly the second best creepy-romantic song ever to Nine Inch Nail’s “Closer”. Back when he was still Puff Daddy he sampled this iconic song for his massive tribute track to B.I.G. It’s just one of those songs that are embedded into modern pop culture. The opening riff builds and takes us through what is most likely going to go down as The Police’s biggest track.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard "King of Pain", but apparently it was a single. It’s a decent enough song, but I’ll forget everything about it in no time. I think "Wrapped Around Your Finger" is a better song. It’s a more down-tempo song, but it reminds me of their better songs. It’s a slower ballad that proves that new wave reggae can’t be sexy.
I like the tranquil trip that is "Tea in the Sahara", but it’s another song that I’ll never thing about again once this is done. The final track on the final album is "Murder by Numbers". It’s a bouncy “ditty” that is not like anything else on the album. If the album had the bluesy groove of this song I’d probably like it a lot more. Not a bad closer, but a little weird. Not surprising. The main difference between this album and the other’s is the lack of reggae love. It’s mainly cheesy casio sounding synth stuff. It butchers the identity of the band for sure. There was some good stuff on here to be appreciated and obviously it has “Every Breath You Take” so that’s something. All in all, this may have been the worst “overall album” of the bunch. Not a great way to close out what was a more than solid run.
THE VERDICT
(1978 – 1983) - This ended up being more tedious than I’d have expected. I assumed that since The Police are brought up so much when discussing 80’s rock that they’d have been better. I heard a few of the bigger singles, like everyone, but I never paid too much attention. There was some stuff that was downright awesome, but for the most part the albums were full of filler and there was no real album progression. It was a bunch of songs surrounding a bunch of sounds with a few of them being gems. I don’t know. I just expected more.
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