BY MICHAEL GOODPASTER
“Worst Case Scenario” is a new take on the concept of “fantasy booking”. For years professional wrestling fans would spend endless hours of thinking up the coolest things that could happen. Why waste the energy? This only leads to high expectations. “Worst Case Scenario” flips that. Instead of looking through rose colored glasses, let’s take a bi-weekly look at the worst possible scenarios in professional wrestling. I’m not going to be malicious or anything too mean, but I will not refrain from letting my brain come up with the worst possible shit I can. Sadly, it seems the writers and producers of mainstream TV wrestling and the mainstream iPPV level indies are doing the same thing but charging us for it. And now…
“The McMahon Coliseum!”
Eventually they’ll run out of ideas. They’ll need a big huge event to draw in the crowds and buy rates. Eventually the storylines won’t work anymore and the characters won’t draw. Things go in a cycle, but for that to happen there has to be a “down time” part of it. This would have to be the worst possible “down time”.
Imagine The McMahon Coliseum! Say Wrestlemania 35 or so. We’ll give the current life as we know it in wrestling get some more time. For Wrestlemania 35, we’ll have to go with the idea that no one cares anymore. The arena would be set up like the coliseum. The McMahon family would sit in a very well lit and fancy sky box.
Then the matches would be called out at random. It wouldn’t be as hokey as a spin the wheel scenario because the weeks leading up to it would involve “Qualifying Matches”. So we’d have to make sure all of the biggest stars are involved. So when the McMahons call out for a random battle it’s AT LEAST involving the cream of the crop.
There are no rules to these matches. It’s ALL Last Man Standing. The 10 count can only be administered after the McMahons give the very dramatic and symbolic “Thumbs Down” to wrestler. From that point on, it’s “sudden death”.
If the McMahons choose, they can decide what weapons are included. I would also institute what I’m going to call the “Night at the Apollo” rule. If the crowd starts chanting “boring” and not getting into the McMahons should send in enforcers to end it and put the crowd out of its misery.
At the end of the night, whoever is left standing is forced to enter the coliseum one more time. The final survivor is deemed the ‘Champion of Champions’ and has to marry Stephanie McMahon.
It’s basically, the McMahon Thunder Dome… but with columns and lions!
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